Should i Lose My Virginity ? ...stupid...

A girl asking this question... LMAO ...i am going to kill myself ...LMAO

I'm 19 and a virgin because i believe that i should give it up to a man that im marrying or someone i love . i believe he needs to prove his love to me but now i don't want to anymore . I wanna give up to a stranger meaning someone i have no emotional attachment to because if i wait till im married or fall in love its gonna hurt even more to know i waited so long to have sex with someone whos gonna walk away and leave me or lets say it last forever i don't wanna risk it i wanna lose it now but am i wrong ?should i just wait ? i want to give up my virginity i don't want it to be taken away from me out of love or lust or whatever it maybe.in other words i rather to lose it to a stranger because emotionally im not attached but am i right or wrong ?